Quote of the Day (2011-12-31)

Gareth: I've got a new theory about marriage. Two people are in love, they live together, and then suddenly one day, they run out of conversation.

Charles: Uh-huh.

Gareth: Totally. I mean they can't think of a single thing to say to each other. That's it: panic! Then suddenly it-it occurs to the chap that there is a way out of the deadlock.

Charles: Which is?

Gareth: He'll ask her to marry him.

Charles: Brilliant! Brilliant!

Gareth: Suddenly they've got something to talk about for the rest of their lives.

Charles: Basically you're saying marriage is just a way of getting out of an embarrassing pause in conversation.

Gareth: The definitive icebreaker.

Source: Four Weddings And A Funeral

Quote of the Day (2011-12-30)

Reggie Lampert: You're blocking my view.

Peter Joshua: Ohh... which view would you prefer?

Reggie Lampert: The one you're blocking.

Source: Charade

Quote of the Day (2011-12-29)

Buttercup: We'll never survive.

Westley: Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one ever has.

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2011-12-28)

It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a 1 pound coconut.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2011-12-27)

George: "I was free and clear. I was living the dream. I was stripped to the waist eating a block of cheese the size of a car battery."

Jerry: "Before we go any further, I'd just like to point out how disturbing it is that you equate eating a block of cheese with some sort of bachelor paradise."

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2011-12-26)

Charles: How do you do, my name is Charles.

Old man: Don't be ridiculous, Charles died 20 years ago!

Charles: Must be a different Charles, I think.

Old man: Are you telling me I don't know my own brother!

Charles: No, no.

Source: Four Weddings And A Funeral

Quote of the Day (2011-12-25)

Hansel: I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot.

Source: Zoolander

Quote of the Day (2011-12-24)

And by the way, they're real, and they're spectacular

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2011-12-23)

When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of the life to start as soon as possible.

Source: When Harry Met Sally

Quote of the Day (2011-12-22)

Larry Lipton: You promised you'd sit through a hockey game, and I promised I'd sit through the Wagner opera next week.

Carol Lipton: I know, I know...

Larry Lipton: I already bought the earplugs.

Source: Manhattan Murder Mystery

Quote of the Day (2011-12-21)

Victor Melling: If I'd ever had a daughter, I imagine she might have been something like you... which is perhaps why I've never reproduced.

Source: Miss Congeniality

Quote of the Day (2011-12-20)

Reggie Lampert: I already know an awful lot of people and until one of them dies I couldn't possibly meet anyone else.

Peter Joshua:Yes, of course. But you will let me know if anyone goes on the critical list.

Reggie Lampert: Quitter.

Source: Charade

Quote of the Day (2011-12-19)

Jerry: "Listen to this. Marcy comes over and she tells me that her ex-boyfriend was over late last night and 'yada yada yada I'm really tired today.' You don't think she'd yada yada sex?"

Elaine: "I've yada yada'd sex."

George: "Really?"

Elaine: "Yeah. I met this lawyer, we went out to dinner, I had the lobster bisque, we went back to my place, yada yada yada, I never heard from him again."

Jerry: "But you yada yada'd over the best part."

Elaine: "No, I mentioned the bisque."

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2011-12-18)

Basil Fawlty: [about Sybil's laugh] Sounds like somebody machine-gunning a seal.

Source: Fawlty Towers

Quote of the Day (2011-12-17)

Niles: That bit of inspired lunacy you heard before the commercial was just a little docudrama Frasier and I put together on the dangers of over-medication. Bravo, Frasier, for so brilliantly demonstrating why they call it "dope."

Source: Frasier

Quote of the Day (2011-12-16)

Alicia: There's nothing like a love song to give you a good laugh.

Source: Notorious

Quote of the Day (2011-12-15)

And the aptly named Sir Not-appearing-in-this-film.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2011-12-14)

Kent Brockman: Springfield has come down with a fever: football fever. If you have the fever, there's only one cure. Take 2 tickets, and see the game Sunday morning.

Public Service Announcer: Warning. Tickets should NOT be taken internally.

Homer: See? Because of me, now they have a warning.

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2011-12-13)

Vanessa Loring: You think you're really going to do this?

Juno MacGuff: Yea, if I could just have the thing and give it to you now, I totally would. But I'm guessing it looks probably like a sea monkey right now and we should let it get a little cuter.

Vanessa Loring: That's great.

Mark Loring: Keep it in the oven.

Source: Juno

Quote of the Day (2011-12-12)

[after slicing one of the Black Knight's arms off]

King Arthur: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.

Black Knight: 'Tis but a scratch.

King Arthur: A scratch? Your arm's off.

Black Knight: No it isn't.

King Arthur: What's that, then?

Black Knight: [after a pause] I've had worse.

King Arthur: You liar.

Black Knight: Come on ya pansy.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2011-12-11)

Jim Hacker: "So they insult me and then expect me to give them more money?"

Sir Humphrey: "Yes, I must say it's a rather undignified posture. But it is what artists always do: crawling towards the government on their knees, shaking their fists."

Jim Hacker: "Beating me over the head with their begging bowls."

Bernard Woolley: "Oh, I am sorry to be pedantic, Prime Minister, but they can't beat you over the head if they're on their knees. Unless of course they've got very long arms.

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2011-12-10)

Jim Hacker: "Honesty always gives you the advantage of surprise in the House of Commons."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2011-12-09)

[Vizzini has just cut the rope The Dread Pirate Roberts is climbing up]

Vizzini: HE DIDN'T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE.

Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2011-12-08)

Sam Baldwin: Well I'm not looking for a mail-order bride! I just want somebody I can have a decent conversation with over dinner. Without it falling down into weepy tears over some movie!

Greg: She's, as you just saw, very emotional.

Sam Baldwin: Although I cried at the end of "the Dirty Dozen."

Greg: Who didn't?

Sam Baldwin: Jim Brown was throwing these hand grenades down these airshafts. And Richard Jaeckel and Lee Marvin

[Begins to cry]

Sam Baldwin: were sitting on top of this armored personnel carrier, dressed up like Nazis...

Greg: [Crying too] Stop, stop!

Sam Baldwin: And Trini Lopez...

Greg: Yes, Trini Lopez!

Sam Baldwin: He busted his neck while they were parachuting down behind the Nazi lines...

Greg: Stop.

Sam Baldwin: And Richard Jaeckel - at the beginning he had on this shiny helmet...

Greg: [Crying harder] Please no more. Oh God! I loved that movie.

Source: Sleepless in Seattle

Quote of the Day (2011-12-07)

Reg: If you want to join the People's Front of Judea, you have to really hate the Romans.

Brian: I do!

Reg: Oh yeah, how much?

Brian: A lot!

Reg: Right, you're in.

Source: Life of Brian

Quote of the Day (2011-12-06)

Peter Gibbons: So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.

Dr. Swanson: What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?

Peter Gibbons: Yeah.

Dr. Swanson: Wow, that's messed up.

Source: Office Space

Quote of the Day (2011-12-05)

BR: We don't sell Tic Tacs, we sell cigarettes. And they're cool, available, and *addictive*. The job is almost done for us.

Source: Thank You For Smoking

Quote of the Day (2011-12-04)

I'm saying, that the right man for you might be out there right now, and if you don't grab him someone else will and you'll have spend the rest of your life knowing that someone else is married to your husband

Source: When Harry Met Sally

Quote of the Day (2011-12-03)

Parole Board chairman: They've got a name for people like you H.I. That name is called "recidivism."

Parole Board member: Repeat offender!

Parole Board chairman: Not a pretty name, is it H.I.?

H.I.: No, sir. That's one bonehead name, but that ain't me any more.

Parole Board chairman: You're not just telling us what we want to hear?

H.I.: No, sir, no way.

Parole Board member: 'Cause we just want to hear the truth.

H.I.: Well, then I guess I am telling you what you want to hear.

Parole Board chairman: Boy, didn't we just tell you not to do that?

H.I.: Yes, sir.

Parole Board chairman: Okay, then.

Source: Raising Arizona

Quote of the Day (2011-12-02)

David St. Hubbins: I do not, for one, think that the problem was that the band was down. I think that the problem *may* have been, that there was a Stonehenge monument on the stage that was in danger of being *crushed* by a *dwarf*. Alright? That tended to understate the hugeness of the object.

Ian Faith: I really think you're just making much too big a thing out of it.

Derek Smalls: Making a big thing out of it would have been a good idea.

Source: This is Spinal Tap

Quote of the Day (2011-12-01)

Well, that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.

Source: Holy Grail